Land's End

Funniest things I saw while at a Land's End outlet store:

• Men's gloves marked down to $25.00. Original price: $25.50.
• Hideous Reindeer Sweater, the kind one might wear to an ugly sweater party, one that looked like this (best I could find on the net.  The one I saw was navy blue with red reindeer):

The price of this sweater? $115.  Note to anyone who would want to wear a sweater like this:  go to a resale or thrift shop.  Or call my Uncle Wayne, since he still wears these.  And 

not because he thinks it's funny.  To him, these sweaters are snazzy.  

• A jacket with the RECCO Avalanche Rescue System.  This winter jacket came equipped with rescue reflectors in case the person wearing it gets trapped under snow.  The kicker? A tag on the jacket warning consumers that the rescue reflectors don't prevent avalanches from occurring.  And here I thought blaze-orange nylon could move mountains.  

Warning labels always make me think that the reason they're applied to consumer products is because some dolt in the past had a misunderstanding about what they were buying. Example: McDonald's coffee has a warning on the cup, stating the contents are extremely hot.  This was enacted after some woman got burned, using the styrofoam coffee cup--containing scalding hot coffee--as a thigh master, while driving.  

In this case, I imagine some snowboarder standing at the base of a mountain with his forearms crossed, summoning the Titans with his Land's End RECCO rescue reflectors to stop the approaching avalanche.  He must have been extremely disappointed when he realized he was trapped under thirty feet of snow.  We definitely know he was angry; otherwise, he wouldn't have written a letter to RECCO explaining his dissatisfaction with the jacket and its non-avalanche-preventing reflectors.  

I hate to think that this warning label was created because some ad-whiz had the foresight to believe snowboarders don't understand what the words 'rescue' and 'reflector' mean.  

"With this label, Mr. Recco, we won't get sued if one of those potheads tries to stop an avalanche with our jackets."  

"Good work, Johnny.  You just might have yourself a merry little Christmas, after all."

Does this company actually believe its customers are that dumb?  At least there weren't any reindeer on the jacket; although, I do wish it had been marked down an additional fifty cents.